The funny corner
- NottinghamWhite
- LUFCTALK Admin
- Posts: 31307
- Joined: 11 Nov 2009, 10:10
Re: The funny corner
Just sold all my John Lennon memorabilia on eBay. Imagine all the PayPal.
Winner of the Europa League
Re: The funny corner
What do you call a hen staring at a lettuce - Chicken see her salad
Why can't you use stewing steak as a Windows password - it's not Stroganoff
Why do bees stay in their hive in winter - swarm
Why can't you use stewing steak as a Windows password - it's not Stroganoff
Why do bees stay in their hive in winter - swarm
All at Amazon Books
The Funny Corner
When Santa Got Stuck Up The Chimney
The Thrones Murders
The Funny Corner
When Santa Got Stuck Up The Chimney
The Thrones Murders
- ChilwellWhite
- Howard Wilkinson's military attaché
- Posts: 4868
- Joined: 29 Dec 2014, 18:12
Re: The funny corner
I saw this advert in a shop window that said " TV for sale, £1, volume stuck on full " I thought " I can't turn that down "
Re: The funny corner
I had a knock on the front door last night, it was the police.
Policeman - "Is this a photograph of your wife?"
Me- "Yes"
Policeman- "I'm afraid it would appear she has been in a serious road accident!"
Me- "Yes but she has a lovely personality!"
Policeman - "Is this a photograph of your wife?"
Me- "Yes"
Policeman- "I'm afraid it would appear she has been in a serious road accident!"
Me- "Yes but she has a lovely personality!"
All at Amazon Books
The Funny Corner
When Santa Got Stuck Up The Chimney
The Thrones Murders
The Funny Corner
When Santa Got Stuck Up The Chimney
The Thrones Murders
- BrighouseWhite
- David O'Leary's baby-sitter
- Posts: 769
- Joined: 23 Jun 2011, 19:59
Re: The funny corner
I was watching the Japanese football match when the players all started doing martial arts.
Turns out the game had gone into ninjury time
Turns out the game had gone into ninjury time
There's light at the end of the tunnel and the future's looking very bright indeed.
Re: The funny corner
BrighouseWhite wrote:I was watching the Japanese football match when the players all started doing martial arts.
Turns out the game had gone into ninjury time
- +15
- LUFCTALK Moderator
- Posts: 5164
- Joined: 28 Jun 2010, 17:19
- Location: Flying high with Leeds United.
Re: The funny corner
A Leeds fan and a Man Ure fan get into a nasty car accident. Both vehicles are really wrecked, but amazingly neither of them are hurt.
After they crawl out of their cars, the Scum fan says, "So you're a Leeds fan, that's interesting. I'm a Man Ure fan... Wow! Just look at our cars. There's nothing left but, fortunately, we are unhurt. This must be a sign from God that we should meet and be friends and live together in peace the rest of our days."
The Leeds fan replied, "I totally agree - this must be a sign from God!" He went on, "And look at this - here's another miracle. My car is completely demolished but this bottle of whisky didn't break. Surely God wants us to drink it, to celebrate the fact we are alive and kicking?"
He hands the bottle to the Scum fan who nods his head in agreement, opens it and takes few big swigs from the bottle, then hands it back to the Leeds fan. He takes the bottle, immediately puts the cap back on, and hands it back to the Scum fan. He asks, "Aren't you having any?"
He replies, "Nah, I think I'll just wait for the police..."
After they crawl out of their cars, the Scum fan says, "So you're a Leeds fan, that's interesting. I'm a Man Ure fan... Wow! Just look at our cars. There's nothing left but, fortunately, we are unhurt. This must be a sign from God that we should meet and be friends and live together in peace the rest of our days."
The Leeds fan replied, "I totally agree - this must be a sign from God!" He went on, "And look at this - here's another miracle. My car is completely demolished but this bottle of whisky didn't break. Surely God wants us to drink it, to celebrate the fact we are alive and kicking?"
He hands the bottle to the Scum fan who nods his head in agreement, opens it and takes few big swigs from the bottle, then hands it back to the Leeds fan. He takes the bottle, immediately puts the cap back on, and hands it back to the Scum fan. He asks, "Aren't you having any?"
He replies, "Nah, I think I'll just wait for the police..."
Re: The funny corner
I've been paying 2 pounds a week to the Cats Protection League for a year. Missed two payments and they came and broke my cats legs.
I once played against Don Revie.
Re: The funny corner
Don't cry 4 3 Argentina
All at Amazon Books
The Funny Corner
When Santa Got Stuck Up The Chimney
The Thrones Murders
The Funny Corner
When Santa Got Stuck Up The Chimney
The Thrones Murders
- daib0
- Dick Ray's Talent Spotter
- Posts: 1847
- Joined: 20 Nov 2011, 19:04
- Location: Spain-England
- Contact:
Re: The funny corner
My wife yelled at me earlier "You weren't even listening there, were you?"
I thought "What a weird way to start a conversation".
I thought "What a weird way to start a conversation".
A friendly Reading FC fan! He is a moderator here: http://www.extremefootballforum.com/forum