The funny corner

[NottinghamWhite]

Ive just heard my friend Gav passed away this morning, serious heartburn. I just can't believe Gaviscon.

[Davycc]

Ive just heard my friend Gav passed away this morning, serious heartburn. I just can't believe Gaviscon.

lol

[Deleted User 728]

To build my confidence following another break-up, I went to the local shopping centre and surveyed a hundred passing women around my age with the question "Do you find me attractive ?"

I produced the pie chart below from the answers :

[daib0]

To build my confidence following another break-up, I went to the local shopping centre and surveyed a hundred passing women around my age with the question "Do you find me attractive ?"

I produced the pie chart below from the answers :

[NottinghamWhite]

While in China, a man is sexually promiscuous and does very not use a condom all the time he is there.

A week after arriving back home in the States, he wakes one morning to find his penis covered with
bright green and purple spots.

Horrified, he immediately goes to see a doctor. The doctor, never having seen anything like this before,
orders some tests and tells the man to return in two days for the results. The man returns a couple of
days later and the doctor says, 'I've got bad news for you, you've contracted Mongolian VD. It's very
rare and almost unheard of here, we know very little about it. '

The man looks a little perplexed and says, 'Well, give me a shot or something and fix me up, Doc. "

The doctor answers, 'I' m sorry, there's no known cure. We're going to have to amputate your penis. '

The man screams in horror, 'Absolutely not! I want a second opinion. "

The doctor replies, 'Well, it's your choice. Go ahead, if you want but surgery is your only choice. "

The next day, the man seeks out a Chinese doctor, figuring he'll did know more about the disease.
The Chinese doctor examines his penis and proclaims, 'Ah, yes, Mongolian VD. Vewy ware disease. "

The guy says to the doctor, 'Yeah, yeah, I already know that but what can we do? My American
doctor wants to operate and amputate my penis! '

The Chinese doctor shakes his head and laughs. 'Stupid American docttah, always want to opawate.
Make more money dat way. No need to amputate! '

Oh, Thank God! ' the man replies.

'Yes,' says the Chinese doctor, 'wait two weeks. Faw off by itself! '

[PockWhite]

[PockWhite]

My wife left me last week because of my obsession with horoscopes.
It literally Taurus apart.

[NottinghamWhite]

My girlfriend laughed at me when I said I had a car made of spaghetti. You should've seen her face as I drove pasta.

[PockWhite]

I'm reading a book about anti-gravity.

It's impossible to put down!

[NottinghamWhite]

My wife's obsessed with her new tropical juice diet. It's enough to make a mango crazy.