LUFCTALK

Probably better told verbally than written due to the spelling, but here goes:

Marriage? Never again. I married way too young. It didn't work out. I couldn't speak Chinese and she didn't speak a word of English...

An Englishman, an Irishman and a Chinaman all turn up to a building site looking for work.
The foreman says to to the Englishman: "Right there's a pile of bricks here. Just keep the brickies supplied through the week and we'll have a chat on Friday."
He turns to the Irishman and says: "There's a pile of sand over there. I need it moved to other side of the site by the end of the week."
He then says to the Chinaman: "You're in charge of supplies."
At the end of the week the foreman goes up to the Englishman and says: "I had a chat with the lads, they're really happy. Here's your money and come back on Monday at 7AM for a start."
He goes to the Irishman and says: "Well done mate. You've moved the sand from one side of the site to the other without any mess. Here's you wages and come back Monday 7AM if you want more work." He then asks the Irishman whether he's seen the Chinaman, but the Irishman says he hasn't seen him all week.
The foreman heads off to his portcabin to finish off his paperwork for the week, but as he's passing by a pile of scaffolding poles the Chinaman jumps out from behind them and yells: "sup-LISE!"

NottinghamWhite wrote:An Englishman, an Irishman and a Chinaman all turn up to a building site looking for work.
The foreman says to to the Englishman: "Right there's a pile of bricks here. Just keep the brickies supplied through the week and we'll have a chat on Friday."
He turns to the Irishman and says: "There's a pile of sand over there. I need it moved to other side of the site by the end of the week."
He then says to the Chinaman: "You're in charge of supplies."
At the end of the week the foreman goes up to the Englishman and says: "I had a chat with the lads, they're really happy. Here's your money and come back on Monday at 7AM for a start."
He goes to the Irishman and says: "Well done mate. You've moved the sand from one side of the site to the other without any mess. Here's you wages and come back Monday 7AM if you want more work." He then asks the Irishman whether he's seen the Chinaman, but the Irishman says he hasn't seen him all week.
The foreman heads off to his portcabin to finish off his paperwork for the week, but as he's passing by a pile of scaffolding poles the Chinaman jumps out from behind them and yells: "sup-LISE!"

original!

Now you see her....



There's something about the girl I just can't warm to. She's already thinking of filing a lawsuit against the BBC. Where there's blame hey.

NottinghamWhite wrote:I've had to close my chicken dating agency due to financial problems.

I was struggling to make hens meet

Looked at all these new hotel booking sites but I have my reservations.

I bleached my arse last night,
I fancied a new ring tone!

Ive just invented a new flavour of crisps. If they're successful I reckon I'll make a packet.

King Arthur "Well that's a nice round table, who made it?"
 
Knight "Sir Cumference"

Q. Which is the most musical fish?
 
A. The piano tuna.