The funny corner

The place to discuss anything that isn't football or LUFC

Re: The funny corner

Postby NottinghamWhite » 19 Nov 2020, 10:27

Ghanaian newsreader Reading the Premiership scores

https://twitter.com/i124nk8/status/1328 ... 28353?s=21

Then Seria A

https://twitter.com/i124nk8/status/1328 ... 21761?s=21

Maybe it’s just me but theses had me crying with laughter. :lol:
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Re: The funny corner

Postby yorkfan » 19 Nov 2020, 20:13

Teacher says to class .......... “Children take out your notebooks and pencils…”

Little Johnny replies ..........“I ain’t got no pencil miss”

Teacher replies disapprovingly ,,,,,,,,,,,, “Well Johnny, its not "I ain’t got no pencil", its ........"I have no pencil, he has no pencil, she has no pencil, they have no pencil or we have no pencil…”

Little Johnny replies ...............“So who’s got all the 'effin pencils then?”
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Re: The funny corner

Postby Wigan White » 20 Nov 2020, 11:02

A friend of mine went bald years ago but still carries a comb around with him.

Says he just can't part with it.
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Re: The funny corner

Postby Davycc » 27 Nov 2020, 10:29

What do you call a Chav in a box?

Innit.

What do you call a Chav in a filing cabinet?

Sorted.

What do you call a Chav in a box with a lock on it?

Safe.

What do you call an Eskimo Chav?

Innuinnit.

What do you call a Chav in hospital?

Sick.

What do you call a Chav in a Smarties box?

Sweet.
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The Funny Corner
When Santa Got Stuck Up The Chimney
The Thrones Murders
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Re: The funny corner

Postby yorkfan » 01 Dec 2020, 17:47

Guess who I bumped into today at Specsavers?

Everyone!
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Re: The funny corner

Postby yorkfan » 02 Dec 2020, 18:26

Wish I’d been the person who invented Ovaltine.

I’d be a malty millionaire by now.
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Re: The funny corner

Postby Sniffer » 02 Dec 2020, 19:13

yorkfan wrote:Wish I’d been the person who invented Ovaltine.

I’d be a malty millionaire by now.


That is brilliant. I think I might nick it. :lol: :D
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Re: The funny corner

Postby yorkfan » 03 Dec 2020, 13:43

Why do you never see elephants hiding up in trees?

Because they’re good at it.
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Re: The funny corner

Postby yorkfan » 04 Dec 2020, 15:11

After having dug to a depth of 10 feet last year, Canadian scientists found traces of copper wire dating back 200 years and came to the conclusion that their ancestors already had a telephone network more than 150 years ago.

Not to be outdone by their neighbours, in the weeks that followed, an American Archaeologist dug to a depth of 20 feet, and shortly after, a story published in the New York Times:

“American archaeologists, finding traces of 250-year-old copper wire, have concluded that their Ancestors already had an advanced high-tech communications network 50 years earlier than the Canadians”.

One week later, the British authorities reported the following:

"After digging as deep as 30 feet in North Yorkshire, Jack Arkwright, a self-taught archaeologist, reported that he found absolutely f*** all.

Jack has therefore concluded that 250 years ago, Britain had already gone wireless."

Just makes you bloody proud to be Yorkshire, don’t it!
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Re: The funny corner

Postby Davycc » 05 Dec 2020, 09:30

Image
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When Santa Got Stuck Up The Chimney
The Thrones Murders
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