4. Endured a swarm of locusts.
We were driving in Zimbabwe about fifteen years ago when I spotted a mysterious red cloud in front of us, some way off. It was low level, just above the ground, and moving weirdly like it was alive .. and that's because it was.
Before I'd finished the question : "What the **** is that ?" my sister told me to pull over at the side of the road and park up. There wasn't another car in sight and we were miles from the nearest town. She knew what it was and said we'd be perfectly safe if we just rolled the windows up, so we did .. and then we sat and waited.
It's so strange.
The noise.
The way they seem totally oblivious.
The way they move as one.
And we just sat there as they engulfed the car, with a few being splatted against the windscreen, and then just flew on past.
Really eerie experience and five of the most curious minutes of my life.
5. Went eye to eye with an elephant.
A few years later, we visited a lion and cheetah park. I was driving a pick-up with a bench seat in the front, my sister was at the other end of it and her three small children were sat between us.
The park's very natural and totally different to Longleat and places like that - there's no other attractions, just the animals and a small café.
Every time we drove to a dangerous part, there'd be someone at the gate of the fence warning us to stay in the car and keep the windows up. Boy, it was hot that day ..
I drove gingerly through the lion part and a massive lioness lay across the road at one point, just glaring at me. I say glaring, but she was pretty indifferent and wasn't gonna move. It was when she yawned that I gunned the engine and inched forward, making her finally get up and amble begrudgingly out of the way. By the time we got out of that part and into another safe bit, we were gasping and wound down the windows immediately. We drove along for a bit and as we came to the foot of a small rise, I spotted two adolescent elephants at the top, about to be walked down by their handlers so I pulled to a stop to let them past.
They were still a good six or seven feet tall and the park staff smiled and waved at the kids, one of whom was munching an apple.
The bigger elephant must've smelled it or spotted it and walked over to my window and promptly thrust his trunk into the cabin !
As he reached in for the apple, the kids were squealing with delight, my sister and I were just laughing while I stroked his trunk and turned from the children to the animal and found myself literally eye to eye with one of the most majestic beasts on the planet. He was calmness personified and just wanted to say hello and have a bite to eat. The apple was curled up and away into its mouth and my sister dug out some more fruit which he promptly gobbled up.
It was an amazing moment shared with nature at its finest. The skin, the hairs, the scent, the eyeball, the humour in the soul of that creature .. it was incredible. I'm sure he knew he was being cheeky and with all of us - the staff included - doubled up laughing, he knew he would be alright.
I absolutely love Africa and feel so privileged to know it properly without just being another tourist
