Selby White wrote:Ironic you start by saying you don't want to argue (I thought it was debate with differing opinions), then include questions.
Well, that's what happens with an emotive topic like this.
You know me well enough to know that I won't back down on something I believe strongly in.
Selby White wrote:The last sentence says it all, sly insult (daily mailish
) rather than fact, for the record I don't read any papers just deal with facts.
It's not a sly insult at all : it's me saying that without further expansion on what you meant about Meghan and Harry your inference can be taken to be racist in nature. That's why I asked you to explain what you meant because I don't think you are.
Selby White wrote:It's all yours on here now, I'll complete the games I run but will comment no further.
I sincerely hope not.
We're debating a hot topic on a discussion forum. This is what we do.
Right, now everyone take a deep breath .. believe me, I've taken several before sitting down to answer this in earnest.
This is not a personal attack on either SW or John, both of whom I have a lot of respect for : I know you're both intelligent, generous, kind and lovely men. Gentlemen, in fact.
It's very difficult to dissect this kind of thing without causing personal offence, but believe me that's not my intention even if some of the things I'm going to say (and have said already) make difficult reading.
What I found alarming was this statement about Harry and Meghan :
Of course its speculation, based on my personal opinion which in turn is based on my judgement of their personality types.
Now, by your own admission it's speculation, but how can you possibly know what their personality types are ?
Harry : royal, once third in line to the throne, now fifth I think ? Blokey bloke, armed services, private schooling, rugger, polo, that sort of thing, probably drinks beer through a team-mate's sock after the game.
Or, Harry : grew up in a broken marriage, mother tragically died while he was still very young, sent away to school, distant father, older step-mother who seems to have always been in the background, highly sensitive yet a bit of a lad - perhaps over-compensating ? - yet always had a looser rein (pun intended) than older brother due to less responsibility to the nation.
Meghan : successful TV actress with a range of endorsements, an iconic figure known for her poise, beauty and intelligence, retains the common touch with her legion of fans from every corner of the globe, now living a real life fairy-tale, marrying her very own prince charming.
Or, Meghan : mixed-race broken home starlet who made it big in a TV soap who was probably only cast in the role because they needed to up the quota.
Or were you thinking one of the 16 personality types in a Myers-Briggs test ?
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Myers%E2% ... _Indicator
I've done them a few times for organisations I've worked for and in the US several companies and corporations base part of their recruitment strategy on the results. If you don't know what they are, you answer a series of seemingly random questions and at the end you are presented with the results which align into four categories : Introversion/Extraversion, Sensing/Intuition, Thinking/Feeling, Judging/Perceiving. Each person is said to have one preferred quality from each category, producing 16 unique types. Check the Wiki link for more.
I think trying to guess what "type" of personality either of them have is really hard and the problem that arises from such casual speculation is that it'll only pick up on one or maybe two things that may have been picked up from a news story or social media or a soundbite from an interview or from some "royal expert" on TV doing a talking head on Channel 5.
So I struggle to see how you can make such a judgment and I'm even more staggered with the speculation that their marriage won't last.
If anything, I would expect it to go the distance precisely BECAUSE of what happened with Charles and Diana : Harry knows what a broken marriage looks like because he was in that household. He'll know the signs. He'll know what not to say and what not to do.
Likewise Meghan who, I understand, doesn't speak to her own father ? I don't know much about her but that's the inference I've taken from whatever guff I've absorbed from just being alive in the last few years.
If I don't speak up and say "You can't say that, mate !" then I'm living a lie.
This is a public forum and we have certain standards and I don't like to let things like that slide without challenging them because anyone reading this thread could take that very darkest meaning from what's been said in here and assume that it's acceptable to say things like that.
It's not acceptable to me, that's why I asked for more of an explanation.
Can everyone see where I am with this ?
Why these things worry me ?
Let's take another example : sexism.
Keys and Gray .. "hangin' out the back of it .." that horror show that was filmed candidly .. you know the one.
Oh, but it was acceptable back then.
Well, it may well have been but the reason feminism exists is to stop that kind of language, that kind of treatment, that kind of attitude "she loves it really, don't you darlin' ?" *squeeze*
No, actually, she doesn't. It's not acceptable. If it was your daughter you'd punch them both on the nose and they wouldn't sue you because you'd have them bang to rights.
These days, because of dinosaurs like Keys and Gray and Harvey Weinstein, it's not acceptable, no matter whose daughter, mother, sister, nan, niece it is .. it's wrong, end of.
What's almost worse is the other men watching and cringeing inside but not doing anything about it.
That's why I won't just sit here when vague statements are made without any substance.
I'd like to reiterate that I am not accusing anyone of racism on this occasion but I am strongly holding up my hand to say "Woah ! You can't just say something like that .. "
I hope I've done enough to explain why in what I've said above.
Sorry for the ramble but this is very important to me and, I think, to the ethos of this board as a welcoming, family-friendly fan forum.
